Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
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