I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Found your dick twin last night
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize