Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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