you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize