i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time i carry you out of a forest
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
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