you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
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