i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
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