Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Enjoy the penises
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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