You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
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Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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