he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Randomize