I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Found your dick twin last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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