is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize