I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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