I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
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