His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Randomize