Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
He has the fingertips of a God
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