you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
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Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
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New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
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