I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Randomize