i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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