let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Randomize