Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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