So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
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