i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize