um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
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