At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Randomize