9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
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