Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
you inspire me to be a worse person
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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