I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize