Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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