yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
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