the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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