That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize