You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
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