Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
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