Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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