"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
are you so shy because you have an std?
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That accounts for only three of the penises
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
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