Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize