I love black thongs
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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