Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
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