I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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