is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
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I just found puke in my bra..
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
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I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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