I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
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