called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
you win again, gameday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
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