I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Randomize