Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize