HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
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