What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
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