I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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