Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize