respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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